Friday, June 8, 2012

Why I love Facebook!

There is plenty of brouhaha about Facebook these days. With its recent IPO into the public stock exchange and growing popularity it's a household buzzword! Some people love it, others hate it but almost everyone knows what it is.

Recently a friend posted this site on Facebook.
It's a blog with a goal to help people realize they can live without Facebook and that it is an "unhealthy obsession." as I read through some of the posts I got a little annoyed! They say things like, "Many people on Facebook will brag about their lives and their accomplishments, but in reality, they are accomplishing little by being on Facebook." or "The site felt so negative, yet I still felt a burning desire to share my every moment with the rest of the world."

The reason I got upset is because Facebook in and of itself is not good or's the people who use it that are. If you are addicted or offended or annoyed then own your problem but don't blame it on Facebook.

On 22 July 2011, Anders Breivik bombed government buildings in Oslo, which resulted in eight deaths. He then carried out a mass shooting at a camp of the Workers' Youth League of the Labour Party on the island of Utøya where he killed 69 people, mostly teenagers. In April 2012, Breivik stated in court testimony that a popular Norwegian song promoting tolerance was a Marxist brainwashing tool. When people heard this they were beyond angry and Breivik’s comments prompted Norwegians Christine Bar and Lill Hjønnevåg to organize via Facebook a gathering at Youngstorget, the square in front of the Labor party headquarters. It is adjacent to Breivik's bombing target and just blocks from Oslo District Court, where Breivik is currently on trial.

“Let us stand together,” the two initiators wrote on the event’s Facebook page, which listed more than a dozen parallel events around the country. “We stand together as a people, fellow human beings. Let us sing because we really MEAN that this song describes how the world SHOULD be.”

These women were hoping for at least a hundred people. As people responded 4,000 people said they would come. On the day of the singing 40,000 people showed up to show their solidarity against this terrorist!

Watch here

THIS is just one reason why I love Facebook! I love that people share and messages get out to the masses quickly! I love being inspired by others and laughing at the funny stuff people come up with! I love that my friends are always kind and supportive when I'm having a rough time. To put it simply...Facebook rocks!

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Relationshippy things

I am approaching age 40 and I'm divorced. It's been an interesting ride being single at this age. While I do love my space and being able to make my choices without consulting anyone else, I don't love being by myself all the time. In this day and age, Internet dating is all the rage. I decided to join a site about a year ago. I haven't gotten any real dates but I have learned a whole lot about what men are looking for.

Ya know, I just assumed that at my age men would be realistic about what to expect. When you're approaching 40 you can't always expect to find women who are skinny and modelesque, who wax and get their nails done and stink of yummy body spray! I'm cushy and have age spots and don't have time to fancify my nails and hair and wax everything! In fact, at this age the whole hippie/granola look is more and more appealing!

Well a couple weeks ago I started texting one of the guys I met on the Internet who seemed real nice. The very first thing he asked for was a picture. Okay, fair enough I thought, so I sent him one. The next thing he asked...what are your measurements? Really? Way to woo a girl buddy! Because how many 40 year old single moms do YOU know that measure themselves everyday in case a guy wants to know? Ugh. Yeah I told him to step off.

About the same time I started getting messages from a 49 year old guy. Now I'm pretty open minded and willing to give people a chance even if there's a little age difference, but to be fair I really am only 38. Besides, I didn't find him attractive anyway. So I just ignored his messages. Well he got more and more persistent. Finally I tried to nicely but clearly let him know that he was too old and not my type. He responded with, "well you're fat but since I'm older I figured we were pretty even." at this point I realized that not only am I done with Internet dating...I may be done with dating for good! Maybe I shouldn't judge all men based on the ones I've met online...maybe there's someone great out there for me. For now though, I've deleted my online accounts and decided to enjoy the relationships I have with people who love me for me...cushy, kind, imperfect, loveable me.

Monday, November 28, 2011

If only a hug really could make things all better...

I've been thinking a lot today about my children. When they were young all I had to do was give them a huge hug and maybe a kiss or two and everything usually was all better. They knew I loved them and things were all good. As they've gotten older this method isn't working as well as it used to. I can see the eye rolling happening as I give them a hug. Or I can feel the stiffening as my hug becomes an embarrassment rather than a fix-it-all. The worst is when I can sense the underlying feelings of frustration and anger that nothing seems to fix. How do parents deal with the fact that their children may not always love them. How do we as parents let our kids know that we love them to the moon and back even when some things are beyond our control?

I have a good friend whose daughter (now all grown up) still blames him for a messy divorce situation that left her with her crazy mother. I don't know all the details of the situation but I know my friend loves his daughter more than she will ever comprehend and did the best he could in a nasty, manipulative situation. It breaks his heart that she blames him for "abandoning" her. Some days I worry that my children will ask similar questions. Why did you leave us? Why didn't you keep coming to get us every day? Why couldn't we live with you? All very valid questions but each with such complicated answers. My youngest is constantly reminding me to not forget to come pick him up. And yet each time I do pick them up for a weekend or a visit, the first day or two he acts out in horrible ways and lashes out at me. It breaks my heart because I love him so much and wish I could be with him every second of
every day. I don't want to take him home but I have to.

How do I let my kids know that they are loved?